Damn Tribbles
by SunshineCaroline
Summary: Kirk unleashed Tribbles on the Enterprise, and his second best Engineer has an allergic reaction to them in the middle of the night. A trip to everyone's favorite doctor is in order for a cure. A little humor and a little smut, enjoy! McCoy/OFC


**A/N: This was written between 3 and 4 AM, it's probably too wordy, the characters might be a little OOC, and it's not the greatest smut scene I've ever written, but I finally wrote something (and finished it) for the first time in ages. So, sorry if it's beyond dreadful, but it's here and I'll take any constructive criticism you've got.**

**With that being said, read, review and enjoy!**

Disclaimer: Oh please, nothing belongs to me except Greenly Knox.

James Kirk was an absolute dead man.

Captain or not, the next time Greenly Knox caught sight of him he was done for. _'What kind of idiot,' _Greenly thought as she scratched furiously at the red bumps that covered her body, _'Brings a foreign creature aboard a ship without checking to see if any crewmembers have an allergy to it!' _She reached behind her neck and attacked a particularly itchy bump with her fingernails, sighing heavily as she felt blood on her fingers, realizing she broke the skin.

Dragging herself out of bed (it's not like she was going to get any sleep with all this damn itching), she pulled on a Starfleet issued tank top and sleep shorts, stumbling out the door to her room as she tried to walk and scratch the bottom of her foot at the same time. It was time for a trip to her favorite doctor.

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"Bones! Bones are you awake? Scratch that, I don't care if you're awake, just wake up and open this door!" Greenly whispered into the intercom, pounding on the door with her fist for good effect. "Knox? What the hell do you think you're doing?" She heard Bones' groggy voice come through the speaker and practically leaped with joy. "Oh you know, I was just in the neighborhood, thought I'd stop by for a chat..." She trailed off sarcastically, "I have a medical emergency you idiot! Why else would I be hear at three in the morning, now open the door!"

Greenly was through the door before it even opened completely, still scratching away at the annoying bumps. Bones grumbled to himself as he pressed the button to shut the door and walked over towards her, immediately stopping as soon as he saw the state of the poor girl in front of him.

Her long brown hair was hastily pulled up and secured with an elastic, her brown eyes narrowed in determination to scratch away at herself until she bled, from what Bones could tell. Her pretty heart-shaped face and her tiny frame (Bones didn't care if she was healthy for her size, he was still convinced the girl could use to gain some weight) were dotted all over with red bumps, and Bones immediately went into doctor mode.

"Dammit Knox! What the hell happened?" He asked as he pulled her hands away from their scratching efforts and began to examine the bumps on her arms. "_Tribbles._" She answered with a murderous look in her eyes, "James Kirk and his damn Tribbles. What kind of idiot brings one of those stupid furry things on a ship and expects it not to multiply?!" Greenly shrieked as Bones began to examine her with a tricorder.

"Relax Knox, it's just an allergic reaction, one Hypospray and you'll be good to go." He said as he walked over to a drawer and began digging around in it. "No, no, no, no! You know I hate those things!" Greenly said as she backed away from him and plopped down onto the foot of the bed, absentmindedly still scratching, "Don't you have some anti-itch cream or something? Or a pill, how about a nice big horse pill, I can take one of those!" She tried to haggle, smiling sweetly up at her friend.

Bones eyed her warily, knowing that she could put up a good fight when she wanted to and also knowing that it was going to take a miracle to get her to agree to the Hypospray. Even back at the Academy it had always taken at least 3 nurses to hold her while someone shot her. "Fine," He sighed, and sat down next to her on the bed. "Turn around and stop scratching." He said as he turned her forearms and the rest of her followed suit.

Greenly had to hold back a sigh at the feeling of Bones' cool hands on the back of her neck. His fingers brushed away a few stray pieces of hair that had escaped her ponytail, and she could feel his warm breath on the back of her neck. "What do you think you're doing?" She managed to breathe out, hoping he didn't notice when she leaned into the touch of his fingers.

"I'm checking where you filleted the back of your neck," He said, his voice close to her ear, sending a wave of goose bumps up her spine. "To make sure it's not deep enough to require stitches."

"Aw Lenny, always looking out for me. That's why you're my favorite doc- OW! You sonofabitch!" Greenly jumped from the bed and whacked Bones _hard _in the shoulder in one fluid motion. "I cannot believe you just hyposprayed me! On top of that, I can't believe you tricked me! You're a sneaky bastard you know that?"

Bones chuckled at her. "Still itchy Knox?" "Yes I'm still itchy, you ass!" She held up her arm and began scratching when she noticed that her arm was surprisingly… not itchy.

She shot Bones a look.

"Fine, just because I'm not itchy doesn't mean you're off the hook. You lured me into a false sense of security and then shot me in the neck! That's got to go against some type of doctor code or something." "Your red bumps are gone too, y'know." He said, a self-satisfied smirk on his face.

"I swear if you weren't such a good doctor and if I hadn't known you for so long I'd smack that grin right off of your face." She said, arms crossed over her chest and begrudgingly offering him a small smile. "You're welcome Knox, now go get some sleep, Mr. Scott won't be happy if his favorite engineer is too exhausted to keep up with her duties tomorrow."

Bones watched as Greenly walked to the opposite side of the bed, grabbed a pillow and began to untuck the sheets from the foot of the bed. "Now what do you think you're doing?" Bones asked, a confused look on his face. "Well there's no way I'm going back out into Tribbleland and risking more itchy red bumps, so I'm just going to stay here, where I know it's Tribble free." She said to him as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"You're fine to go back out there Knox, the shot will keep you from breaking out again." Greenly dropped the pillow onto the bed with a 'thunk' and looked at him. "Don't care, not happening. Even if I don't break out I still hate the stupid things."

She turned her back to him and pulled the tank top over her head, dropping it onto the floor. Next came the shorts, which she kicked into the pile to join her shirt. Crawling under the covers in nothing but her boyshorts, she lay down on her stomach, shook the elastic out of her hair and turned her head to look at him. "Geez Bones, I thought you Southern Boys were raised to look away while a lady strips down to her under things and crawls into your bed." She teased, kicking her feet a little under the covers, "Now turn off that light, get in bed and get some sleep."

Bones let out a breath he didn't realize he had been holding and rubbed his hands on his face; It was going to be a long night.

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He was right, it was indeed going to be a long night, and he was only an hour into it. How, in all the years he had known this girl, did he not know how fidgety a sleeper she was? In the past five minutes she had rolled around and changed positions nine different times. _Nine._

Just as he finally thought she was going to be still, she started to move again. Reaching out, Bones grabbed hold of her feet and held them down to prevent her from rolling over. "What the hell, Bones?" He heard from the opposite end of the bed.

"Woman, you have got to be still! You're one move away from getting the strongest hypospray sleep aid I can find." He said, still holding her feet firmly in place. "It's not my fault! I'm not used to sleeping at this end of the bed, it's to off-putting and uncomfortable!" She griped, trying without luck to wiggle her feet free.

Bones sat up, yanked the pillow out from underneath her head and dropped it down next to his. "By all means, if that's all it takes to make you be still then get up here." He grumbled, fluffing his own pillow and laying back down.

Seconds later he felt the bed shift and heard the rustle of the sheets as she crawled to the top of the bed and got situated. Five minutes passed and she hadn't moved, and Bones felt himself beginning to nod off…

Then she moved. Bones squeezed his eyes shut tightly, willing himself to not say anything. Maybe if he stayed still and didn't say anything, she wouldn't either. Maybe she finally found a comfortable spot and wouldn't move anymore.

"Hey Bones?"

Dammit.

"What?"

"Remember that time that-"

"No."

"You didn't let me finish. That time when Kirk had that party at the Academy and-"

"Nope. Can't say I remember. Now go to sleep."

"But we drank all that Romulan Ale, that I still don't know to this day how Kirk acquired it-"

"Still not ringing any bells. Now sleep."

"Yeah, well you were pretty toasted, so I'm not surprised you don't remember. But there was this one part where you and I were doing the race to a dozen and…"

"I mean it Knox, shut up…"

"…Who ever drank 12 cups first had to write the other one's Xenobiology paper…

"…You have 10 seconds to shut your mouth…"

"…And were on your third cup while I was on my fifth and as I went to pick up my sixth cup you…"

"…Five seconds to shut up before I…"

"…Knocked my cup out of my hand and planted a very sloppy kiss on my lips!"

"That kiss was not sloppy!" Bones barked, finally turning over to face her. "Ah! You do remember!" She exclaimed, grinning and pointing an accusing finger at him.

Bones squeezed his eyes tightly shut and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Is there a point to all of this Knox?" "Actually, there is," Greenly answered as she snuggled back into the pillow, looking up at him, "Why haven't you kissed me in three years?"

He opened his eyes and looked down at her. "Uh, dunno… Didn't think you actually remembered that… If you did I figured you didn't want me to do it again so…" He trailed off, noticing how low the sheet was riding on her back, and just how lovely her bare skin looked.

"So you figured that it was best to just avoid the situation at all costs? Instead of even mentioning it you figured we should just go all these years until I end up in your bed half naked after having an allergic reaction to Tribbles and-"

"Greenly?"

"Yeah Bones?"

"Shut up."

His lips collided with hers in an instant, taking in the taste of her mouth without Romulan Ale on her breath. Her hand went to the nape of his neck, tangling her fingers in his hair in an attempt to pull him closer.

His arm circled around her small waist, appreciating the feel of her soft skin against his fingertips. He placed a trail of kisses down her jaw, nuzzling into the curve of her neck before gently dragging his teeth across her clavicle, earning a gasp from her.

Greenly's hips arched at the low growl Bones let out before continuing to kiss down her body, into the valley between her breasts, his hands ghosting across her nipples, earning him another arch of her hips. Slowly he began to kiss his way back up, reaching her mouth, he pulled her even tighter to him as she gently bit his lip.

"Dammit woman, remind me again why it took so long for this to happen?" He mumbled against her lips, his hand sliding down to grab her leg and hitch it up to his waist. Greenly let out a moan at the new closeness and the friction it created. "Because we are stupid, stupid people." She managed to breathe out as Bones began to nip and kiss at her neck again.

Bones hooked his thumb into the top of her boy shorts, "These," He growled, "Need to come off. Now." Sliding them down her legs, Greenly kicked them off when they reached her feet and hooked her finger into the top of boxers and tugged on them. "It only seems fair Bones," She smirked before pulling them all the way down.

He groaned as the final barrier between them was removed and he could feel every inch of her glorious body against his. Sliding his hand down between the two of them he brushed his fingers across her swollen lips, earning a whimper from Greenly. "For the love of everything Bones, don't be such a tease," She begged, reaching her own hand down and grabbing a hold of him and sliding her hand up and down once, "Because you know, two can play at that game."

Smirking at the groan that escaped his lips, Greenly put her mouth to his ear, "So what's it gonna be, Doctor?" She slid her hand up and down his length again and gently bit his earlobe.

In one swift motion Bones had her arms pinned above her head with one hand, the other holding her leg firmly hooked to his waist. Resting his forehead against hers, he slid into her as slowly as possible, gasping against her lips.

Pulling almost completely out, Bones watched as Greenly's eyes fluttered shut and her back arched up as he slid back into her. Picking up the pace, Bones captured her lips in another kiss, sliding his tongue across her lips before gaining entrance to her mouth. Releasing her wrists from his grip, he once again slid his hand down between them.

He pressed the pad of his thumb against her swollen nub and began to rub in a circular motion, earning high-pitched gasp from her lips. Greenly brought her other leg up and locked it around his waist, dragging her nails down his back, desperately trying to pull their bodies even closer together. Slowly, Greenly felt the familiar heat beginning to build in her stomach, and began to pant at the sensation beginning to build.

Tugging Bones by the hair she crushed her lips to his, arching her hips to meet his every thrust. She came crying out his name, her muscles tightening around him, the combination causing him to reach his own peak. Greenly collapsed back into the mattress first, and Bones laid down next to her, pressing a kiss to her temple.

"Think you can manage to fall asleep and stop fidgeting now?" He asked, a smirk on his face as he tried to catch his labored breath. Greenly returned with a smirk of her own, rolling to lay on his outstretched arm, hooking her leg over his, "Shut up and go to sleep, Bones."

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Jim Kirk walked down the hallway of the _Enterprise_, taking the liberty of letting himself into Dr. McCoy's room on this particular dark space-filled morning.

He stopped short when he saw his Chief Medical Officer and his second best Engineer wrapped around each other, sound asleep. "Wow, I probably should learn to use the intercom from now on…" He went on as he watched the two start to wake up, "Good morning you two, I see some people enjoyed themselves last night." He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Bones smacked a hand to his forehead, sighing. "Dammit Jim, it's too early to have to deal with your voice." Greenly quickly piped up, "It's surprisingly thanks to you, Captain. Or rather, your stupid Tribbles that I had an _allergic reaction _to!"

Kirk laughed sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. Greenly continued on, "By the way, you have until the end of the day to get every last Tribble off this ship, or I'll have Scotty see to it that they all meet the same fate as Admiral Archer's prized beagle." "But- But no one even knows what happened to that beagle!" Kirk said nervously.

"That's exactly my point. Oh, and I think I'll need to spend the day quarantined with the good doctor looking after me to make sure I don't have another allergic reaction." She finished, watching Kirk's mouth open and close, obviously trying to come up with something to say. "Fine." He said, obviously defeated. "But don't think that just because you're getting away with this this one time doesn't mean that you scaring me and that fact that you're half naked right now will always work."

Greenly fell back onto the bed in laughter as Kirk walked out the door. Bones turned to look at her, a look of shock on his face, "You have got to teach me how to do that darlin'."

"_That_ can't be taught," She said, rolling over to lie on him, locking her arms around his neck, "But we've got all day for me to teach you plenty of other things." She finished as he pulled her lips down to meet his.

-Fin.-


End file.
